LISA BRADY addresses woman who knows Conor McGregor better than anyone

Dear Dee,

Firstly, I wonder how you are. I can't imagine what it has been like for you, to have such darkness of your private life so publicly laid bare. To have so many people express repulsion at the name of the person you love most in the world.

At this point, all four corners of the globe know what your fiancé - the father of your children, your life partner - did. And I'm not just speaking about the depravity and violence shown to Nikita Hand. We can get to the specifics of that later.

No - I'm referring to what he did to you, Dee. His absolute disregard and disrespect for you, the mother of his children, his rock, the supposed love of his life.

As the world is awakening to the type of man your partner is, I wonder what is it you know. What is your truth?

Because, while your statements on social media this week allude to how much you love and believe your violent fiancé - and how you have both moved on from his forceful transgressions - I don't quite buy it. There's something else going on, Dee. There has to be.

You're a woman. You're a mother. You're a human being, who all those years ago, fell in love with a man. A dedicated, bombastic one - but one who built himself up from nothing to become a global sporting icon.

That must have been intoxicating to be part of, and I'd imagine, difficult at times too. But you stuck by him loyally while he worked his way from being a plumber to a champion athlete.

He promised you the world, and for a large part, he delivered - in the form of wealth beyond your wildest dreams and, of course, the family you created together.

But as impressive as his career achievements have been, we've seen his violence seep from the ring into the public sphere; that toxic masculinity that he showcases with pride has always been there and, for so long, we've given it space.

His violent outbursts, online tirades, a former physical attack for which he was convicted and at least one former claim of assault - all excused away as just part of his 'notorious' persona.

Like infamous influencer Andrew Tate - who is himself accused of rape, and also faces sex-trafficking charges in Romania - your brutish fiancé is fronting antagonistic masculinity, a vulgar materialism to aspire to, and one that endorses dominance over women. And as the world has now seen, it's not just fighting talk. We now know more of exactly what McGregor is capable of - this man who once tellingly referred to himself as 'the double champ who does what the f**k he wants'.

You either love him, or loathe him. And we know you love him.

It speaks volumes, Dee, when a dishonourable man like Tate is in your corner, spewing rhetoric of how it's 'impossible to be a man in a Western world' - expertly gaslighting as so many toxic men do, victim-shaming women and making the aggressors out to be the ones who are wronged.

We saw how McGregor said similar things in the courtroom recently, plaintively looking for sympathy as he explained that he was 'beyond petrified' when he heard he was accused of rape.

This is the same man who inflicted a 'multiplicity' of injuries with 'vigorous, athletic sex' (a term that I've heard so many times over the last couple of weeks, and still makes my stomach churn).

The same man who lost his veneer of composure with a contemptuous comment regarding his accuser, said with such aggression that it drew audible gasps from onlookers in the court gallery and from the jury.

But then, Dee - you know this. You can't live with this narcissist and not see that sinister flash, when the double champ's ego is threatened and he doesn't get his way.

I can't imagine what that's like to live with. So I wonder if this skewing of his reality is something to which you have become conditioned .

And you can tell me to butt out of your business, but the truth of it is, your words have done damage. They have done women all over this country - no, all over the world - a huge disservice.

I have no doubt you are hurt. I would be too.

There was nothing but misery written on your face as you left that courtroom last month, clutching your man's hand.

The very hands that brutally battered a woman while he cheated on you in the most deplorable way. You looked absolutely devastated and utterly humiliated. Of course you did.

But you directed all that hurt, all that anger, not to the man who betrayed you so callously.

No - you laid all the blame of this whole disgusting mess on the one woman who has done what many of us - including myself - have only dreamt of doing.

Against all odds, standing up to a powerful man, who violated her without her consent and treated her like a piece of meat.

What you did, Dee, was allude to the belief that because a woman was texting provocative pictures to 'another woman's man with a family and child on the way' that she deserved to be raped. You then went further by suggesting that because this woman was 'out of her face', she was essentially fair game.

The judgement in your language was so regressive and depressing, indicative of a rape culture that I truly believed we were moving away from. How can you justify such abhorrence - at the hands of the person you share a life with, a family with?

I have daughters, Dee. You have one, too. What if, God forbid, in years to come, one of my girls came home, battered and bruised and injured, telling me she said no... I can't imagine my anger. As a mother, can you?

As a general rule, consensual sex doesn't leave a woman looking like they've been in the ring with - well - your partner.

And the pièce de résistance? The terrifying prescience of bringing this twisted mentality to the next generation.

Telling us that you will warn your sons that women such as Nikita Hand exist in the world.

It would be easy, Dee, given the outrage this case has caused and all the issues it has raised - of consent, misogyny, toxic masculinity - to level some of that anger at you.

Read More

Dee's blistering attack: Conor McGregor's fiancée breaks her silence after UFC star loses trial

But as the tide turns against the McGregor empire, the brands retreat and his fanbase shrinks in horror at this monstrous man, you chose to stay. And I'm not convinced the reasoning is as simplistic as you loving a very lavish lifestyle.

Of course, you might still love him, although how you could ever even look at his face again after the way he has treated you - the way he treats women - is beyond my comprehension. But matters of the heart are complex, and we may never as human beings truly understand why we love the way we do. Denial also presents in myriad ways, and truly processing this horror might be too much to handle.

A huge consideration is your children. Nobody wants to break up a family. As a mother, it's the toughest decision you'll ever have to make. Believe me, Dee - I've done it. And the father of my children is a good, honourable man, who would never dream of inflicting the type of violence your partner has shown.

But your children are watching and learning. So I would ask you this: please change the narrative. Indeed, tell them that women like Nikita exist - and they are strong, brave and brilliant.

They are to be respected and listened to. They are not to be abused or denigrated. They are to be honoured and cherished and kept safe.

Please do your best to raise decent, empathetic sons, who believe that they are equal to their sister, to the girls and women around them. And why? Because they were taught so by the most important female in their lives - their mother.

Dee, the future is in our hands. And as a mum of sons, you have an opportunity to help forge a better world for our daughters. Every journey begins with a single step - and I pray you choose your direction wisely. 

Lisa