Paul Byrom reunited with birth mother after finding out he was born in a mother and baby home
by Shauna Bannon Ward · RSVP LivePaul Byrom was told that he was adopted from a “well-to-do” family who had a teenage daughter that wasn’t ready to have a child.
However, it wasn’t until later in life when he and his parents found out that he was actually born in St. Patrick’s Mother and Baby Home.
His parents thought they were sending letters and photos of Paul to his birth mother, but she never received them.
Read more: Mother and baby home survivor (70) left a wreck as birth parents married and had more kids
When Paul was reunited with his birth mother last year, he found out that she had registered her interest to meet him 16 years beforehand.
Paul appeared on Ireland AM to share his story of discovering the truth behind his birth and meeting his birth mother - who he has now established a relationship with.
“When I was adopted my mother and father got basic information. They were told that I was from very good, well-to-do people and that I was born into a private nursing home. That the girl that had me was only 16. They felt as a family that it would be best to put me up for adoption. There was no mention of anything other than that.
“My mother thought that it was great and she was very appreciative and very grateful. Mum sent photos for a good while of my progress as I was going from baby to toddler. That was that.
“Because I had this lovely notion of what I had been born into, I felt that, 'I'm grand and this is great'.”
He later found out that all the letters and photos that his mother had sent were never given to his birth mother.
As the years went on and Paul became an adult, his mother spoke with him about starting the search for his birth mother.
“My mum was very encouraging and almost pushing me to go find my birth mother in recent years,” he shared.
“She used to always say, ‘Paul, would you not go and try to find her and let's get the full circle of what happened and more than anything else just to thank her’.”
Paul spent quite a while trying to find information on his birth mother, but it wasn’t until he finally got a two page document that he realised he was born into a mother and baby home.
“I was handed over to Tulsa and they went looking. Then I would hear nothing for months on end and then I would follow up. This went back and forth for quite a while.
“Then I got the basic information sent to me and it was at that point I realised things weren’t as they seemed. A two page document with very minimal information on it came through and it said that I was born into a mothers and babies home.”
Paul and his birth mother were able to reunite and had an open conversation about their experiences.
“When I met her... she’s a lovely, lovely lady. As soon as I walked into the room she said, ‘Oh my god’. I reminded her immediately of a relative of hers.
“She was very softly spoken, very pragmatic - a black and white kind of person. There were no frills or thrills, it was a very honest and open conversation.
“She asked me straight off, ‘Did you get the orange teddy bear I left in your cot for you?’ It was a little dog. I said no.
“I asked her, ‘Did you get the photos?’ and she said no. My sister had made a little photo album of when I was a baby right through to the present day so we could look through it together.
“As she looked at it, she came to my mum and put her hand on her and said, ‘That’s the life I wanted for you’.”
His birth mother recalled her memories with him after he was born. He shared: “She said, ‘I had a couple of hours with you and all I remember is your little hand on my thumb’ and that was it.”
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